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| journal musings, part III |

from Suffering and the Sovereignty of God:

"...before God made the world he had in view Jesus Christ slain, and he had in view a people purchased
by his blood written in the book. Therefore, the suffering of Jesus was not an afterthought, as though
the work of creation did not go the way God planned. Before the foundation of the world God had a book
called the book of life of the Lamb that was slain. The slaying of the Lamb was in view before the work of
creation began." 

one advantage i had, growing up a church kid, was to hear teaching on difficult doctrines at various times throughout my life. so coming across this passage was not one of the earth-shattering moments believers experience at different parts of their life. but there's a grand difference between hearing something as a child and hearing it again (or to be literal, reading it again) as an adult.

...the suffering of Jesus was not an afterthought...it was God's plan, all along, to allow his Son to endure the full suffering of Calvary; the full physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual agony that filled him was in the design all along. not just planned in the middle of a night, with the sin of man and the depravity of the world in full view - planned before anything was created, before the fall of man, when it was true to say, "And it was good."

in the words of all infomercial announcers, everywhere: but wait, there's more...

"Everything - everything - that Christ accomplished for us sinners he accomplished by suffering.
Everything that we will ever enjoy will come to us because of suffering."

lamentations 3:32-33 reads: Though he cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love; for he does not willingly afflict or grieve the children of men.

...i cannot wrap my head around it, in full, but i can begin to see how a God - wholly blameless, pure in love - allows, ordains, and sustains suffering. and not only that, but i see how he does so with only his glory - and our ultimate good - in mind. just because our world is built to operate on the principles of thriving and rejoicing in abundance but wallowing in need or trial does not mean we, in the end, define the truth of the matter. everything - every good thing - that i enjoy comes to me because of suffering.
ultimately, because of the planned suffering of Christ; everyday, because God tests those he loves.

...in the words of john piper, i don't need to fathom this mystery. i'm purely content to live with its truth.